I'm not gonna take it anymore! : )

I haven't felt well enough to want t0 write anything since the last post. I felt even sicker than I normally feel after chemo because I finally caught from my dear old hubby's cold. I suppose the sight of us both snorting and coughing and blowing and sneezing could seem funny if we were on a sitcom, but it's been pretty darn miserable, especially yesterday. The morning was the worst, but it helped to drink some fluids and to turn on the humidifier full blast next to me. It was a combination of the "truck ran over me" fatigue and achy feeling from the chemo, the constant drip of my nose, dry stinging eyes, and the constant sinus pressure in my head.

We tried to make it a little festive by having a scaled down version of Thanksgiving, and even though we couldn't taste much, we (mostly Rick) made some of the traditional Thanksgiving Day "fixin's". Since the weather was also gorgeous, I forced myself to walk, dragging along in the beginning, broke down in tears on Rick's shoulder for a minute, and then about halfway through, actually was able to enjoy the sunshine and the breeze -- it really helped. I had to remind myself that at least I wasn't in the hospital like I was LAST Thanksgiving, but I almost think it might have been easier then, because at least I had the nice push button pain relief "you will soon not care about much of anything" gadget to push around with me.

Later in the afternoon we watched the video, "Live Free and Die Hard" and it was very entertaining, but it was also fairly long, and by the end of it I was empathizing quite well with the "dying hard" part of it (HA!). I conked out for about an hour and had a very refreshing nap, then we watched episodes of "24" -seems like the dialogue in the earlier episodes are not nearly as good as the later ones, so I think I'll skip to the end of the last season if I watch any more of those.

When I went to bed last night, I told my body and myself that I'd had ENOUGH of being sick, and that when I woke up in the morning I was going to be better. I even did some of that visualization stuff they talk about - picturing germs and cancer being swept out of my body...(shades of "The Green Mile") - Hey, I was ready to do anything by that point. I guess it worked, because even though I had drenching night sweats for some reason (and I haven't had a fever), I woke up feeling like a new person. My nose was all dried up, the fatigue had lifted considerably, and my eyes and head felt fine! My taste and appetite are not back yet and I have few sore spots on my tongue, but that's all Mickey Mouse stuff to me now. I know I'm on the way up in this crazy horrible ride and I think I'm going with the mantra, "I'm sick of being sick and I'm not gonna take it anymore!" OOOOHH, I'm scaring myself!!!! lol.

Addendum: I had to say goodbye to my favorite nurse at the clinic on Wednesday - she is going back to school and taking a job with different hours. I went to Southern Season and got her a going away gift and some goodies for the rest of staff. I'm so glad to have gotten to know her and thankful she was there for me during the worst phase of the chemo. I hope to see her in the near future if she comes out to play soccer as she says she plans to do.